Thursday, October 9, 2014

Fork It - Stick A Fork In Me, I'm Done

Fork It - Stick A Fork In Me, I'm Done
I know, two days, two posts. Am I sick? No, this story is so good I couldn't let it go unpublished!

Let's go back in time a few years; actually about forty years. When I was a kid growing up, Mom had a wooden presentation case filled with silver flatware. She kept this box tucked neatly away from prying eyes in the buffet given to her by Aunt Laura. I know this flatware was silver because it tarnished and she just "had" to polish it before every use.

Anyway, about three years ago while Paula and I were up paying her a visit, Mom decided to part with her prized silver and gave it to us as a Christmas gift. Since I knew what it was, I didn't pay to much attention to the contents and gave Paula a quick look.

Once we were home, we opened the case to check things out. That's when I realized the silver was gone and had been replaced with Betty Crocker flatware (Mom was always saving coupons when I was a kid). I asked Mom later where the silver went and she told me it was in the case. It didn't really surprise me that she'd done that. The Betty Crocker was nice looking, it was shiny and no more tarnish. That was one of my first laugh and shake my head moments. Little did I know then how things would turn out now. We ended up adding Mom's flatware to our own daily use utensils. I did ask Mom later about where her real silver had ended up and she swears she gave it to us.

So anyway on to yesterday. Mom had just finished breakfast and brought her plate in to the kitchen. I was talking to Paula on the phone at the time and just happened to catch Mom take her fork, wipe it off with her napkin and slip it into the front pocket of her pants. I looked at her and asked why she was taking the fork and she replied in an angry, scratchy, witch-like toned voice, "it's mine, I must have left it here, I'm taking it." Being the smart-ass that I am, I reached over to the silverware drawer, pulled it open and said, "OK, you gave it to us as a Christmas gift a few years ago, but if you want more, here's the rest."

She sat the fork on the counter and quietly walked to her room.

Over the past week or so, I've been noticing that are spoon count has dropped drastically. It seems like we are always out of spoons. Now I know why. When Mom's eating breakfast today, I'll go on a silverware hunt and recover what I can. She is pretty good at hiding stuff. Paula saw here setting blankets on her hope chest last week, my guess is Mom had hidden "her silver" inside.

It's just another day of fun, fun, fun!


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